I was taking photographs when I heard the news. It’s hit me hard. If I type I cant cry. So I am typing.
I feel like I’ve lost my father. Again. Worse this time. This person I knew.
I have just answered the phone to a shaky voice telling me a good friend of mine has died.
Graham Wiseman was more than a friend though. He was a father figure, a mentor, a teacher, the one guy who enabled me to do what I do.
Of course he would deny all this. He was far too humble to take any credit for the kindness and inspiration he passed on to others.
He would do anything for anyone. He did so much for me.
Up until recently Graham owned Redding Photographic studio in Rugby Town centre. The studio had offered it’s services since 1904 and Graham was proud to pick it up and carry it past it’s centenary.
I had I met Graham through his step daughter. I was heading off to travel the world and he told me not to take the ridiculously compact APS camera that was in my back pack.
I ignored him and it was many countries and years later when I returned to Rugby and told Graham he was right.
I was on the dole at the time and could earn an extra tenner a week if I was on a work placement. I asked Graham if he would sign me off not really intending to do any work. He did and even lied to the officials that would pop round and ask how I was doing. I was in a band. I didn’t need a job.
But I found myself spending more and more time in the studio. Whenever I was in town I would pop in.
I got to grips with Photoshop before I learned how to take a decent photo and with access to the studio dark room, I was developing and printing before learning how to use a camera properly.
I felt like a photographer. So I walked into the local newspaper and said I was a photographer. Graham had a way of installing confidence in people. At that point I hadn’t really taken any photos I was truly happy with. Still, someone had phoned while I was in the newspaper offices reporting the photographer had just broken both of her arms in a car crash. And I got the job.
That night I remember the both of us reading the manual of the newspapers weighty digital SLR. One of the first. We marveled at the technology. I knew I was hooked.
Still not wanting me to learn the wrong way, Graham gave me an old 1950’s manual rangefinder telling me it would do till I could afford a Leica. He was only half Joking.
One day he handed me a massive set of keys to his studio with a heavy keyring bearing my initials in brass. I was gobsmacked. Moved. He said anytime in the evening or on Sundays his studio was mine.
It was one of the single most enabling things anyone has done for me. The trust, the faith, the generosity just made me want to be as good as I could possibly be. This was my office in town. A place to shoot photos should I want to, but mainly to surround myself in the tech, the history and the art.
A few months later I was taking photos for the dailies, a few more after that I bought a Leica M6. I proudly showed Graham the first frame off my first film.
He said “You’ve got it.” He didn’t mean photography. He said I’d never stop learning and he was right. He meant I had captured ‘The Decisive Moment‘ and he handed me a book by Henri Cartier Bresson.
Over the next few years we shared books, magazines, camera purchases and his studio. We rarely worked together as we shot different subjects but we spent many hours chatting, browsing Ebay for tech and putting the world to rights.
When I went freelance It was because Graham said he would do all he could to help. All the PR requests that came through to the studio he would pass on to me. When he went on holiday with the family I would watch the shop.
He loved his family so much. He loved everybody and everybody loved him. Genuinely funny, truly wise. He would give his last penny if he thought you needed it.
Never has the death of a friend affected me so much. When I look around, when I look at me, my life and family. Much of it is because of the start he gave me. The confidence and advice in work and life.
I did thank him once. We had a manly mutual back slap after I had got back from Iraq. He was proud and that made me so happy.
His death came quick and sudden yesterday. He died in his chair. He wasn’t old. He never will be.
He was my friend.
What a wonderful man! I’m so sorry for your great loss *Hugs* x
Christian, my condolences for the lost of your great friend and mentor and also to his family.Thank you for sharing a little piece of your recollections of Graham. You’ve conveyed your love and respect admirably for him and he’ll leave a big space in your life, but he’ll always live on in your memories and heart.I’m a big believer that every good friend that we have, adds to our own personality and is a reflection of who we are. He has passed something good to you and you pass it on to the next friend, infinitum.Keep well.Derek
A beautifully written post. I am sorry for your loss Christian.
Thank you so much Christian. Derek is absolutely right, we all need someone like this. Thinking of you.
Christian, a *moving* tribute. You, and the rest of his family, all remain in my prayers during this time of your grief.
I had met this man on several occasions throughout my time in the town and he was always pleasant and proffessional. I am truly sorry for your feelings of loss.
Like many have said here he sounds as if he was a wonderful man and I am really sorry for your loss. But a part of him lives on in you and the way that he has touched your life – and that will stay with you.
That’s so tough, Christian. I am sure he was proud of the way you paint pictures both in words and pixels.Big, hard hug.
The world needs more Grahams. Thank you for sharing his story and it’s impact on you, Christian. Hopefully inspiration will come out of the sadness.
such moving word-images. you were indeed privileged to know him. thank you for sharing the stories, and just a glimpse of those experiences.
A very beautiful tribute, may Graham Wiseman’s memory be always for a blessing. Please Christian, accept my condolences too for you loss.
Hi Christian. I know Graham as a friend and have worked with him on many occasions. Your words are so true, Graham was a gentleman in every sense, he’ll be greatly missed by everyone who was fortunate enough to know him. My thoughts are with Jane and his family.
My condolences, Christian. How fortunate you were to have someone like Graham in your life!
Like you, I came to Graham two years ago and I knew nothing. In fact I came to ask him to photograph my wedding! He was so enthused and this was Contagious and what began with me ‘just popping into Reddings’ ended with me spending the whole day comparing camra’s and images and experiences with one of the most wonderful men I’ve ever met.Graham then proceeded to teach me the wedding industry from the inside out, he took me along on wedding shoots and we would sit and have a pint or two afterwards and laugh at all the things that had happened that day.I have now ended up taking over the studio in Rugby. I’ve changed the name and I’ve painted the walls – but every day, every where I look, and every image I take and process – Graham is there behind me saying “take the shot lad” or” isnt that a bit dark”?I will miss him, and my thoughts are with Jane and family and also with all of the people that have been touched by his life – and to be honest, I’m feeling a little sory for myself too at the moment, I feel as though I have just lost my Father too, and we will never resolve the Nikon / Cannon war now! Rest in Peace Graham, you will never be forgotten, Grant x
What a loving tribute to a man that shaped the documentally we all know and admire. He lives on in you much as you’ll live on in your little doc. Namaste.
Thank you for sharing this with us, Christian.This really has brought a tear to my eye, the way you describe Graham and your relationship reminds me so much of my Grand Father and I. Even today I still feel the pain that he is no longer with us and it’s been 3 years.It’s incredible the impact someone can have on a person.My thoughts are with you, Christian and with Graham’s family.My best wishes, Adam.
What a man and what a story. Best wishes Christian.
I didn’t know Graham, know you only through 140 characters, short videos and images but feel certain that you were both so very fortunate to have known each other. My thoughts are with you and both your families. simfin
Wednesday 20th, 10am. It’s Graham’s funeral right now and I’m so sorry that I am unable to be there. He was a great friend, business colleague and social companion. I shall miss him. My feelings are going out to Jane and his girls right now.
Such a moving tribute to your dear friend Christian – hope youre ok Documentally. Big Hug x